July was a doozie! I'm glad to see it go. It seems that for at least half the month I've been existing under this black cloud of bad luck.
As I said to my dad last night, now that there is a new month, maybe my moon will move out of the house of shit ass bad luck in into something better, even if its moderate luck I would be satisfied.
Yesterday was the worst day of them all.
I got all moved in on Saturday, it was a long day, but pretty much went without incident, and I went to my parents house afterwards because I didn't want to deal with the chaos that night. My first night in the house was Sunday.
I got my first dose of the reality of living with roommates when I walked in and P was all cozy on the couch with his non-girlfriend Legs. I don't know why they call her Legs, as far as I can tell they're kind of short. Anyway! I put away my stuff and confined myself to my bedroom for the rest of the night, which was good because I needed to build my bookshelves and I have cable. My bookshelves came out well except for on shelf I put in upside down and didn't realize it until it was too late. (sigh) That's the shelf my big books will be on.
I woke up on Monday morning, got everything together and was ready to go, but the whole time I could feel I was up tight and slightly panicked about the commute. I get like that. Once I do something the first time I'm fine, but I stress about the unknown.
I'm in my car, and I pull out and CRACK! I hit a car going by me. I can't believe what I just did and I can't remember if I looked, which I can't imagine that I didn't. I have no idea how I did it, I only know I did do it. It was my fault.
I get out and look at my car and immediately crumple. I just dissolve into tears. The bumper is hanging off and the left headlight is just dangling there like an eye hanging out of its socket that you always see on Halloween masks. The grill is protruding at a grotesque angle.
I did this. My poor car.
The woman stopped, amazingly enough I did very little damage to her car. We exchanged information and she was on her way.
I did know what to do. J was home and he tried to push the bumper back in, but it was still too loose I was afraid to take it on 93. I could just imagine I coming loose in the tunnel and that was not a chance I was willing to take. He put my headlight in the trunk and I went in to call a rental company.
Lucky for me the Enterprise was right down the road and I was behind the wheel of a shiny red Focus by 8:30. The whole incident took 45 minutes, but it felt like forever.
The rest of the day I was all tensed up, I felt like my shoulders were around my ears the whole day, I was in a fog and my head was killing me. I'm so mad at myself. It just seems like I'm doing more and more stupid things as the days pass. I HATE doing stupid things and this one takes the cake.
My mom tried to cheer me up with stories, like when she rear ended someone on the way to my soccer game, or the time my dad hit a parked car, or backed out with the gate up on the station wagon smashing the whole rear window. The time my Nana opened her door and someone drove by and took it clean off and the time Mrs. S hit the dougnut truck. I know everyone makes mistakes, I just hate it when its me.
I had to turn in my keys last night to my landlord and I got all teary while I was there. Three years is a long time. Its the longest I've lived anywhere except my parents house. I nursed my first broken heart there, fell for G there while I was watching him make coffee in his boxer briefs and created my first home there all by myself. It was mine and only mine for a little while and that will always be special. G said I should have taken pictures, but I'll never forget what it looked like.
I guess every thing just moves on and I will settle in. My dad came up and duct taped my bumper and took the car home. Its amazing to me what that man can do with duct tape! In the dark with the exception of the gaping hole where the light should be, it almost looked whole.
I sure know how to make a memory special. I will always remember my first day in Cambridge as the day I almost destroyed my car. I can never do something easy.
I'm crossing my fingers that August will be a better month!
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